it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize