You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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