did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Blood and glitter go together right?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Randomize
