You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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