Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
