he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
