how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
