I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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