I met the friendliest cop last night
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
