I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
