the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
