it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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