i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
