Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
