Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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