yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
