And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
