My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
