I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
