: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
50% drunk capacity currently
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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