Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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