would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
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