You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
