I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
