Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
