these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
