just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize