We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
my poor anus
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
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