i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He called his prostate his "boner button".
ttyl tear gas
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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