The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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