Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
