just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
