I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
