you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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