I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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