If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
