So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
