im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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