Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
