So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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