i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
