fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
it's like heaven, but drunker
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
