yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
