No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
