We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
