i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
We got so high we made milksteak
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Randomize
