i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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