I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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