Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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