is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
